Suffice it to say the summer flew by very quickly while we are in "hurry up and wait" mode.
September brought and end to the summer rush and a new number in our waiting family line:
we are in the "teens"!
Wow!
That hit home with the realization this could all be happening sooner rather than later. The internal struggle hasn't changed at all as we wait for our monthly update- patience and excitement and wondering and waiting.
We are still waiting for our referral- to receive a picture and a biography and news that our son is waiting for us. Crazy! We are affiliated with Children of All Nations (CAN) adoption agency out of Texas. Their 'sister' agency that has in-country contact in Ethiopia is West Sands. Recently the staff from West Sands took a trip to Ethiopia and informed the families in the program that they are in need of medical supplies. Right now it's the rainy season in Ethiopia- and the constant moisture and temperature fluctuations can get the babies in the orphanage sick with respiratory issues (much like we do in the fall here in the USA). The e-mail from the West Sands staff spoke of the great care given by the nurses, but also of some "needs"- simple things like diaper rash cream, scrubs for the staff, mosquito nets for the beds- that would lessen the burden on the children and staff. As a nurse I know what it means to have every supply you need at your finger tips. I can't imagine working day to day needing simple supplies, which is why I have started gathering some of the 'needs' to be delivered by a traveling family. If anyone who is reading this would like to donate scrubs, diaper rash cream, mosquito nets or other medical supplies, just e-mail me at sillyhille @ gmail and I will be happy to point you in the direction of making a donation too.
One thing that really touches me is the possibility that my son's heart beats on this very same planet as mine right now. Waiting family number eighteen- and as we wait for our monthly update filling our days with school and work, God's hand is moving across the globe in ways we won't ever fully comprehend. It is highly likely that my son has been conceived- I often wonder: has he been born? Is he one of the babies being rocked by the nurses who are asking for supplies to be donated? It can sometimes be frustrating to be here waiting and wondering, hoping for a monthly update that has us closer and closer to seeing his face, but when I really let myself think about the process of adoption that has led us here- and the path that will lead us home, I don't have anxiety at all about it- I feel nothing but peace and happiness.
And I think that's the way it should be.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Ethiopia On My Mind
We got our January update this week, and we are still several referrals away from the top of the list.
I often get asked, "How do you handle the waiting? And why do you seem so calm when you talk about this adoption?"
I get overwhelmed with thoughts & emotion when I think about our adoption and everything that goes into our son becoming a part of our family. There is a chance that we could have our referral by next Christmas. That means right now, somewhere half way around the world a woman is pregnant with my son.
Except it's her son right now.
Our son.
I don't know the circumstances that could surround his conception, his gestation, his birth or ultimately his delivery to an orphanage. Whether his family can not care for him by inability or lack of desire, I do not know. In fact, it does not matter to me.
I already love him and I love his biological mother for what she is doing.
My God is a sovereign God and I don't think we are his second choice for this child. I think before our son's conception, God knew this child would be our child. He is at work in his biological mother as much as He is at work in me, and I am in awe of that thought. Everything is happening in His time, according to His plan. I can't force this, I can't wish or pray any part of it to happen more quickly. What God is doing there is infinitely more important than the wait I am enduring here.
I read something a while back that just echoes with me when I think about the biological mother in our adoption process.
Once there were two women,
who never knew each other.
One you do not remember,
the other you call Mother.
Two different lives
shaped to make yours one.
One became your guiding star,
the other became your sun.
The first gave you life,
the second taught you to live it.
The first gave you a need for love,
the second was there to give it.
One gave you a nationality,
the other gave you a name.
One gave you the seed of talent,
the other gave you an aim.
One gave you emotions,
the other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile,
the other dried your tears.
One gave you up.
It was all she could do.
The other prayed for a child,
and God led her straight to you.
And now you ask me through your tears,
the age-old question through the years:
Heredity or Environment -
which are you the product of?
Neither my darling, neither,
just two different kinds of love.
I know that once we receive our referral and know more of our son's story, I will grieve for him and for her- his biological mother. In fact, I think I already do when I think about her (which is on a daily basis). Does she know right now that she can not keep her baby? Has she already made that decision? Every time I think of her, I am driven to pray for her.
When given the time to really think about the chain of events that takes place from conception to the final gavel tap finalizing an adoption, it's mind blowing. It's also awesomely powerful and convinces me time and time again that miracles happen in this world. This journey is not made by accidents; it is formed by divine intervention, and those miraculous actions take time.
I suppose it's all of those things that make this waiting seem easy.
-Sarah
I often get asked, "How do you handle the waiting? And why do you seem so calm when you talk about this adoption?"
I get overwhelmed with thoughts & emotion when I think about our adoption and everything that goes into our son becoming a part of our family. There is a chance that we could have our referral by next Christmas. That means right now, somewhere half way around the world a woman is pregnant with my son.
Except it's her son right now.
Our son.
I don't know the circumstances that could surround his conception, his gestation, his birth or ultimately his delivery to an orphanage. Whether his family can not care for him by inability or lack of desire, I do not know. In fact, it does not matter to me.
I already love him and I love his biological mother for what she is doing.
My God is a sovereign God and I don't think we are his second choice for this child. I think before our son's conception, God knew this child would be our child. He is at work in his biological mother as much as He is at work in me, and I am in awe of that thought. Everything is happening in His time, according to His plan. I can't force this, I can't wish or pray any part of it to happen more quickly. What God is doing there is infinitely more important than the wait I am enduring here.
I read something a while back that just echoes with me when I think about the biological mother in our adoption process.
who never knew each other.
One you do not remember,
the other you call Mother.
Two different lives
shaped to make yours one.
One became your guiding star,
the other became your sun.
The first gave you life,
the second taught you to live it.
The first gave you a need for love,
the second was there to give it.
One gave you a nationality,
the other gave you a name.
One gave you the seed of talent,
the other gave you an aim.
One gave you emotions,
the other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile,
the other dried your tears.
One gave you up.
It was all she could do.
The other prayed for a child,
and God led her straight to you.
And now you ask me through your tears,
the age-old question through the years:
Heredity or Environment -
which are you the product of?
Neither my darling, neither,
just two different kinds of love.
When given the time to really think about the chain of events that takes place from conception to the final gavel tap finalizing an adoption, it's mind blowing. It's also awesomely powerful and convinces me time and time again that miracles happen in this world. This journey is not made by accidents; it is formed by divine intervention, and those miraculous actions take time.
I suppose it's all of those things that make this waiting seem easy.
-Sarah
Monday, November 26, 2012
I obviously suck at blogging....
Gah! September was my last post- really?
We were officially dossier to country in September just in time for Brett's birthday. Having a monthly number update is only mildly exciting, considering the "list" doesn't always move by the same number of places each time. There could be 1 referral or 10 in a month... so it's all arbitrary. (Yes- we have obviously done the math 100 times with "if there are XX referrals on average every month we could have ours by XX date!) We are being overly optimistic when we say that we hope to have a referral in hand by Christmas....2013. :) I can't help but think about Earl Nightingale's quote:
"Don't let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway."
So I guess we wait for the time to pass! As we prepare for Christmas we have been doing a lot of reading about the Ethiopian celebration of Christmas- Ganna- held on January 7th. Typically there is fasting on the day before, followed by an early morning Church service and a meal of wat (stew) and injera (flat bread). I'm thinking I need to find a recipe and attempt my own wat & injera... I would love to have that tradition in our house as well! They also have a big celebration on January 19th for the commemoration of the baptism of Christ. I can't wait to learn more about these celebrations and host some of our own in the years to come!
How does your family prepare for Christmas?
We were officially dossier to country in September just in time for Brett's birthday. Having a monthly number update is only mildly exciting, considering the "list" doesn't always move by the same number of places each time. There could be 1 referral or 10 in a month... so it's all arbitrary. (Yes- we have obviously done the math 100 times with "if there are XX referrals on average every month we could have ours by XX date!) We are being overly optimistic when we say that we hope to have a referral in hand by Christmas....2013. :) I can't help but think about Earl Nightingale's quote:
"Don't let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway."
So I guess we wait for the time to pass! As we prepare for Christmas we have been doing a lot of reading about the Ethiopian celebration of Christmas- Ganna- held on January 7th. Typically there is fasting on the day before, followed by an early morning Church service and a meal of wat (stew) and injera (flat bread). I'm thinking I need to find a recipe and attempt my own wat & injera... I would love to have that tradition in our house as well! They also have a big celebration on January 19th for the commemoration of the baptism of Christ. I can't wait to learn more about these celebrations and host some of our own in the years to come!
How does your family prepare for Christmas?
Thursday, September 6, 2012
USCIS Approval
Today we received USCIS approval in the mail... This isn't any kind of major hurdle, but a very necessary one. Having all the correct legal paperwork in place to allow us back into the USA after our second trip to Ethiopia is sure handy! ;)
Probably the most exciting thing is that my best friend from childhood is expecting her first child this March! (It's been a hard secret to keep too!) I know that she & her husband will be amazing parents and I can't help but wonder.... Will we have children about the same age? Isn't that every girls dream- to raise a child at the same time as her best friend? We have been told repeatedly that we should expect 12 month wait for our referral- and realistically it could take longer than that- but every time we get a new approval of something, an e-mail from our agency, or even just read news from Ethiopia (or stalk Addis Ababa on Google Maps, right honey?) we just grow in excitement. Although my second child may not be exactly the same age- I'm still very excited to see our families growing at the same time!
Because someone asked earlier and I hadn't gotten around to posting again (let alone answering questions)- the agency in Texas we are using is called "Children of All Nations". It's all a bit complicated when you cross international borders, but essentially there are only so many approved agencies that are allowed to facilitate adoptions from Ethiopia- So CAN handles the end of things in America but they work with another agency called West Sands. West Sands is responsible for the Ethiopian end of things- and the bottom line is that West Sands is the official agency that is helping us to adopt. Clear as mud, right?
We have also been asked quite a bit "Why Ethiopia?" and although I've touched on it a bit before in previous posts, it comes down to a few basic things. First, we knew we felt called to adopt from Africa. Of all the African countries that allow married couples under the age of 30 with biological children (yes- you can be too young to adopt by some countries standards!)- we did some serious research on each program left. The end point is that Ethiopia has a very stable adoption framework and they have a genuine concern for their infants/children in the system. It also helped that we KNOW people who have adopted from Ethiopia. Having the ability to e-mail and chat with other families and friends of families really helped seal the deal, so to speak.
The last question I've been asked recently is in regards to our timing in sharing our news- Did we share our adoption news early? Yup! Have you ever asked a 4 year old to keep a secret? :) When our social worker had to interview Madigan for the home study, we knew she needed to be clued in. The social worker asked completely age appropriate questions- but Madigan was prepared to answer when she was asked about adoption, how she felt about being a big sister, and how prepared she was to wait longer than most sisters have to wait. (PS- to Gwen, the social worker who was tasked with "interviewing" our daughter--or did she interview you? I'm still not sure--... God bless you. That is all I have to say!!)
Have I missed anything in this synopsis? :) Feel free to ask!
Probably the most exciting thing is that my best friend from childhood is expecting her first child this March! (It's been a hard secret to keep too!) I know that she & her husband will be amazing parents and I can't help but wonder.... Will we have children about the same age? Isn't that every girls dream- to raise a child at the same time as her best friend? We have been told repeatedly that we should expect 12 month wait for our referral- and realistically it could take longer than that- but every time we get a new approval of something, an e-mail from our agency, or even just read news from Ethiopia (or stalk Addis Ababa on Google Maps, right honey?) we just grow in excitement. Although my second child may not be exactly the same age- I'm still very excited to see our families growing at the same time!
Because someone asked earlier and I hadn't gotten around to posting again (let alone answering questions)- the agency in Texas we are using is called "Children of All Nations". It's all a bit complicated when you cross international borders, but essentially there are only so many approved agencies that are allowed to facilitate adoptions from Ethiopia- So CAN handles the end of things in America but they work with another agency called West Sands. West Sands is responsible for the Ethiopian end of things- and the bottom line is that West Sands is the official agency that is helping us to adopt. Clear as mud, right?
We have also been asked quite a bit "Why Ethiopia?" and although I've touched on it a bit before in previous posts, it comes down to a few basic things. First, we knew we felt called to adopt from Africa. Of all the African countries that allow married couples under the age of 30 with biological children (yes- you can be too young to adopt by some countries standards!)- we did some serious research on each program left. The end point is that Ethiopia has a very stable adoption framework and they have a genuine concern for their infants/children in the system. It also helped that we KNOW people who have adopted from Ethiopia. Having the ability to e-mail and chat with other families and friends of families really helped seal the deal, so to speak.
The last question I've been asked recently is in regards to our timing in sharing our news- Did we share our adoption news early? Yup! Have you ever asked a 4 year old to keep a secret? :) When our social worker had to interview Madigan for the home study, we knew she needed to be clued in. The social worker asked completely age appropriate questions- but Madigan was prepared to answer when she was asked about adoption, how she felt about being a big sister, and how prepared she was to wait longer than most sisters have to wait. (PS- to Gwen, the social worker who was tasked with "interviewing" our daughter--or did she interview you? I'm still not sure--... God bless you. That is all I have to say!!)
Have I missed anything in this synopsis? :) Feel free to ask!
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Paperwork: Complete
After mailing off our USCIS I-600A (Application for advance processing of orphan petition if you're not 'hip' on the adoption lingo...) we are done with the majority of our paperwork. There will be a few more things to send in at the request of the federal government, and maybe a few papers and things to exchange with our agency in Texas, but for the most part ladies & gentlemen.... This process is out of our hands!!
I have been researching several different organizations that give adoption scholarships and adoption grants, and I think now that our home study is complete I will apply for a few of them. As I have said before (and will say many more times on this journey) I fully believe in my heart that this adoption is God's plan for our family. It doesn't mean that we have everything figured out, that we will be perfect parents, or that it will even go seamlessly and beautifully.
Our social worker at the agency in Texas has been great about communicating with us and updating us on the process. Right now, it sounds like once our "Dossier" is translated and sent to Ethiopia, the wait time to get our referral is about 9 months on average. (Our dossier is currently being translated right now.) I have to laugh when I tell people that and they say "but that is SO long to wait!" because to us, it seems SO close. We 'waited' for Madigan for 2 years. We've been holding this adoption in our hearts for years, and actively 'working' on it for 6 months. So if we have a referral in hand a year from now, it actually feels quick to us!
In June (for Father's Day!) we joined The Mocha Club. The premise is for $7 a month (the cost of giving up 2 coffee's a month) you can donate to humanitarian efforts in Africa. Our team (Bring Home Hille, naturally!) has dedicated our donation to building clean water wells in Ethiopia. If you're interested in joining our team & donating to the great causes as well, you can check out this link { http://themochaclub.org/joinme/BringHomeHille } or leave your e-mail and I can send you an invite.
You can also go to themochaclub.org to read up on all their work and their mission.
Blessings!
I have been researching several different organizations that give adoption scholarships and adoption grants, and I think now that our home study is complete I will apply for a few of them. As I have said before (and will say many more times on this journey) I fully believe in my heart that this adoption is God's plan for our family. It doesn't mean that we have everything figured out, that we will be perfect parents, or that it will even go seamlessly and beautifully.
Our social worker at the agency in Texas has been great about communicating with us and updating us on the process. Right now, it sounds like once our "Dossier" is translated and sent to Ethiopia, the wait time to get our referral is about 9 months on average. (Our dossier is currently being translated right now.) I have to laugh when I tell people that and they say "but that is SO long to wait!" because to us, it seems SO close. We 'waited' for Madigan for 2 years. We've been holding this adoption in our hearts for years, and actively 'working' on it for 6 months. So if we have a referral in hand a year from now, it actually feels quick to us!
In June (for Father's Day!) we joined The Mocha Club. The premise is for $7 a month (the cost of giving up 2 coffee's a month) you can donate to humanitarian efforts in Africa. Our team (Bring Home Hille, naturally!) has dedicated our donation to building clean water wells in Ethiopia. If you're interested in joining our team & donating to the great causes as well, you can check out this link { http://themochaclub.org/joinme/BringHomeHille } or leave your e-mail and I can send you an invite.
You can also go to themochaclub.org to read up on all their work and their mission.
Blessings!
Monday, May 21, 2012
Community
I have to say I've been overwhelmed by the support we have received since we shared the news that we were adopting.
I have had several people in the community e-mail, facebook message me, or stop me to talk to me in person about it. We definitely feel supported.
Right now we have gathered the final paperwork and it's being reviewed by our agency for approval. When we get the thumbs-up from them the official notarized, signed-in-blue-ink, duplicate copies will be sent to them for the great wait.
To be clear and answer a few questions we have had- we have not been matched with a child. That is what we are 'waiting' for- it's called a 'referral'.
We are required to take two trips to Ethiopia. The last update we received from our agency guesstimated the wait between first and second travel to be 3+ months at this point. It's all speculation until it's our turn to board the plane, really.
There are a lot of unknowns, but don't ever be afraid to ask us a question or drop us a line to support us. We are excited and we would love to talk about it- really!
Just in case you didn't see the link to the pictures, you can see them HERE. We love them...
I would love to know what anyone would like to hear about at this point... unfortunately there may be a lot of 'long pauses' to fill because the adoption process is 90% waiting and 10% action. :)
Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
:)
I have had several people in the community e-mail, facebook message me, or stop me to talk to me in person about it. We definitely feel supported.
Right now we have gathered the final paperwork and it's being reviewed by our agency for approval. When we get the thumbs-up from them the official notarized, signed-in-blue-ink, duplicate copies will be sent to them for the great wait.
To be clear and answer a few questions we have had- we have not been matched with a child. That is what we are 'waiting' for- it's called a 'referral'.
We are required to take two trips to Ethiopia. The last update we received from our agency guesstimated the wait between first and second travel to be 3+ months at this point. It's all speculation until it's our turn to board the plane, really.
There are a lot of unknowns, but don't ever be afraid to ask us a question or drop us a line to support us. We are excited and we would love to talk about it- really!
Just in case you didn't see the link to the pictures, you can see them HERE. We love them...
I would love to know what anyone would like to hear about at this point... unfortunately there may be a lot of 'long pauses' to fill because the adoption process is 90% waiting and 10% action. :)
Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
:)
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Welcome!
My guess is if you've landed HERE today for the first time, it's because we have finally went public with our big news in the most fun way I can imagine- pictures!!
I met our photographer- Carissa at Heart & Seoul Photography- a few months prior to our application submission. We met in an online forum for photographers, and quickly became friends. I have always loved doing 'announcement' photography- announcing a pregnancy, a baby's gender, or an engagement- and I mentioned that I would love to do a session to 'announce' our adoption to the world when we were ready. It was divine intervention that she had planned a trip that took her directly through our hometown in April! As an adoptive mom herself, she has been very aware of the process & the emotion that goes into the adoption and captured our news in a way that I can only describe as perfect. Seeing the images just makes my heart happy- I have no other way to describe it.
She was there for the moment we told Madigan she would be a big sister. I love those pictures! We are so blessed to have already met so many supporting and loving people along the way.
If you want to know more about the back story, you can keep scrolling down the page and read up. The cliff's note's version of this adoption is that we have always felt like adoption is 'right' for our family, and we took the first big step in January 2012 by applying to Children of All Nations (CAN). We found an amazing social worker to write our home study, and one million, bazillion notarized forms later, we are almost completely done with our paper-chase and will soon be moving on to the hardest part yet: waiting. We are so excited at the prospect of bringing home an Ethiopian son to join our family! The process can take up to 2 years (or more!) and we are committed to this for the long haul. So dig in with us, and check back for updates. Leave us some love & support & words of encouragement. Say a prayer or two for us along the way.
Happy Mother's Day!
I met our photographer- Carissa at Heart & Seoul Photography- a few months prior to our application submission. We met in an online forum for photographers, and quickly became friends. I have always loved doing 'announcement' photography- announcing a pregnancy, a baby's gender, or an engagement- and I mentioned that I would love to do a session to 'announce' our adoption to the world when we were ready. It was divine intervention that she had planned a trip that took her directly through our hometown in April! As an adoptive mom herself, she has been very aware of the process & the emotion that goes into the adoption and captured our news in a way that I can only describe as perfect. Seeing the images just makes my heart happy- I have no other way to describe it.
She was there for the moment we told Madigan she would be a big sister. I love those pictures! We are so blessed to have already met so many supporting and loving people along the way.
If you want to know more about the back story, you can keep scrolling down the page and read up. The cliff's note's version of this adoption is that we have always felt like adoption is 'right' for our family, and we took the first big step in January 2012 by applying to Children of All Nations (CAN). We found an amazing social worker to write our home study, and one million, bazillion notarized forms later, we are almost completely done with our paper-chase and will soon be moving on to the hardest part yet: waiting. We are so excited at the prospect of bringing home an Ethiopian son to join our family! The process can take up to 2 years (or more!) and we are committed to this for the long haul. So dig in with us, and check back for updates. Leave us some love & support & words of encouragement. Say a prayer or two for us along the way.
Happy Mother's Day!
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